William’s Story
Recovery Triumph: Alcohol
Alcohol was a long term problem for me. I started drinking and smoking pot when I was about 14. By 15 or 16 drinking and smoking pot was a regular weekend activity. Binge drinking proliferated in my late teens and early twenties. I drank beer, mixed drinks, and shots. I began blacking out fairly regularly by my late teens and would do terribly embarrassing things: kicked out of bars, fights (sometimes with my best friends or strangers), and basically made a fool of myself many times in front of friends and family.
I was in and out of college for about 7 years-finally graduating at the age of 25. I had extreme anxiety and panic attacks during these college years which was the primary reason it took me so long to graduate. At times I would be too hungover and nervous to sit in class rooms.I moved from RI to Florida in my twenties. Decided to quit booze at age 26 in Tampa. Stayed sober about 2 years primarily because I met a bunch of new friends in AA. I never cared much for the 12 step talk. Always thought it was a bunch of religious mumbo jumbo. But I did enjoy the camraderie and new friendships I acquired in the group. It was a fairly social time. Fast forward and I fell off the wagon after meeting an attractive female who I married. I started getting drunk again and she divorced me 2 years later after witnessing too many blackouts. For the next 18 years I continued to binge drink. I usually would get drunk 4 times a week with usually one blackout (or brown out) per week. I tried quitting intermittently by going to AA-but never recaptured the magic I found when I was 26.
At age 49 I finally quit for good after experiencing a heart attack-via tachycardia event. I didn’t go back to AA. I saw a therapist and psychiatrist to get treated for the underlying cause of my alcoholism-general anxiety disorder. I got online a lot with SMART and learned to think rationally. I also started to meditate and exercised frequently. But most of all it just seems I outgrew the desire to drink. I always liked the bars but I was growing tired of “going out”. Today I feel great and have full custody of my 15 year old son.
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